Wednesday, April 24, 2013

A beautiful thing is never perfect. -Proverb

                          Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect.
                          It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.      
                         -Unknown




In recent days, I have been thinking a lot about perfection. 

I think expecting everything in your life to be "perfect" is to set your self up for a very difficult life. And I think that the idea that perfection is actually attainable is a terribly false and misguided idea. I think it is a handicap. I think it leads to heartache, as inevitable disappointment will follow. Why? Because everyone's idea of perfection is different. So your idea of a perfect day is likely not my idea of a perfect day. Also life happens, as it will. Things, events, moments will develop organically and expecting "perfection" will only lead to frustration as you try to control circumstances that are beyond your means. 

The sooner you are able to accept that life, people, circumstances all have a mind of their own, the sooner you will arrive at peace. It is important to peacefully and lovingly value people over material things, for example. It is important to peacefully and lovingly value experiences over appearances, for example. It is important to be happy with what your efforts bring you. For example, if you have worked really hard to put an event together instead of expecting things to go as "perfectly" as you have imagined you might be better off congratulating yourself for all the hard work and dedication you have devoted to your event. You should first thank the universe that you have the means to dedicate your resources and time to planning your event. After that leave it to the universe to make it the best it can be naturally. Be at peace with your effort and then let it go. Rather than being controlling, which will inevitably lead to stress and disappointment (because people won't behave as you want them to or because they won't dress as you want them to or because someone might drop a glass of wine on the floor or chair or on a white tablecloth); instead, enjoy the fruits of your labor and let life happen. Believe me, people won't remember the material things but they will remember if they felt loved and welcomed and whether it was a happy time! People remember experiences over things!

It is important to know that things or appearances are not truly what matter in life. In your last day, I promise you that things or appearances are not going to hold your hand, praying your safe passage. I promise you that it will be people and most likely your closest family, who will be there for you holding your hand praying for a warm embrace from your ancestors when you get to the other side! Remember in life the truly special moments have nothing to do with material things or whether people think you are rich or fabulous or beautiful or better dressed than your brother or sister or that you have a perfect house or car or a perfect life; what makes for truly special moments is that you share unbounded love, that you are kind, that you are thoughtful, that you make some else feel that they matter, that you show peaceful and loving light to those around you (no matter what they are wearing or what car they drive or whether they have less money than you). It is funny how the people who most positively affect your life are never the people who flaunt material things or who have misguided ideas of perfection or who are controlling, but the people who love you, who are happy for you, who offer support or a kind word when you need it. The people who you truly come to admire and respect are the people who think you are perfect in your imperfection!

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